


On my skin

by LilisBooks



Category: The Boys (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, But also, Canon Compliant, Hughie is Butcher's Canary, Hurt No Comfort, I would say they're unhealthy, Is also, M/M, No betas we die like lamplighter, Unhealthy Relationships, of sorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:29:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27186589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilisBooks/pseuds/LilisBooks
Summary: Having a soulmate was more than what movies showed you, and sometimes they hurt you in ways no one ever could. But they could also save you from a dark path, somewhere you're better off not knowing.Or...Butcher and Hughie are soulmates, and well, this is the result.
Relationships: Becca Butcher/Billy Butcher, Billy Butcher/Hughie Campbell, Hughie Campbell/Robin Ward, Hughie Campbell/Starlight | Annie January
Comments: 20
Kudos: 113





	On my skin

**Author's Note:**

> So, I'm back on my bullshit. 
> 
> Based on the prompt _Universe where, when you realise you love your soulmate, the name with which they think of you appears above your heart._
> 
> Loving a soulmate is not necessarily romantic, so you can interpret this kind of love whichever way you want. I want to see it as romantic, but platonic could also work.

Butcher remembered perfectly the day the named ‘Butcher’ appeared on his skin. 

He had never cared for soulmates before, as Becca hadn’t been his and he hadn’t been Becca’s. He knew he loved his wife no matter what, and they had both turned their backs on the concept by being with each other. They were happy together, choosing each other every day instead of trying to find out who “the universe” thought it was meant to be for them. Well, that was right until Homelander came and ruined everything. 

He never gave a thought about soulmates after that, that’s it until ten years later, when he was standing in the middle of a sewer, covered in blood and guts, with the only possibility of getting her back right there for him to grasp. He could see Becca right at the end of the tunnel and didn’t want to waste a minute longer. But then Hughie had been discovered by fucking Starlight and Homelander, and Butcher had given up his chance to see Becca again. 

He didn’t regret it, not one bit, especially as they were sitting next to each other on the couch while Vought gave once more their bullshit speech on what had happened. Hughie had looked at him with a soft expression on his face and a small smile on his lips, and Butcher had felt content and relieved like he hadn’t in a really long time.

But it was until that very night, when he was getting ready for bed, when he saw in neat calligraphy his last name above his heart. It was clear and clean, like a certain handwriting he had seen from his stalking days. And it didn’t take a genius to figure out who his soulmate was, or what the name appearing actually meant. 

He tried to put some distance between himself and the lad, going as far as to run away towards Becca the minute Mallory gave him the address. He hung onto Becca the second he spotted her and held her in his arms, cherishing those moments shared with her and talking about the future where the both of them would be together. 

But he knew and she knew that it was just an idyllic dream, far away removed from reality. They were not the same persons they had been 10 years ago when first separated, and to think that and cling onto the past was nothing but a delusion. Butcher was not the man Becca remembered, and Becca had the kid, and she would always put him above anything else, even Butcher. He couldn’t fault her for that, not really, so he slipped away with a broken heart to never return.

Hearing Hughie’s voice ripped his heart apart in new and different ways, hearing him say “I’m not mad,” when talking about him bailing on them for Becca or when his voice broke when saying “You could’ve said goodbye.” He couldn’t have, not to Hughie, not after Becca. If he were another man, he wouldn’t have left at all or would have returned to never look back, but the man Butcher had become had no place in endangering his canary any more than he already had.

“I know we’ve been through some shit together,” Butcher said as Hughie’s voice still rang in his ears, “You were… You were always like my canary, I suppose.” 

Hughie said nothing, not that Butcher expected him to, but he traced absentmindedly his finger over the name in his chest, thinking about the man that had put them there.

“Thank you,” he said after a breath. “Goodbye Hughie.”

And with that he hung up, ready to run away from everything that had hurt him and could potentially destroy him.

Only for it to backfire on him when he found the lad and MM in his aunt’s living room waiting for him with a smile on their faces and Black Noir just outside to kill them all. He had wanted to do the noble thing and sacrifice himself for his canary, as it was his fault the Supe was there in the first place, yet Hughie was having none of it as he came to his rescue and tried to save him, to no avail. The lad had guts and spirit, but no real skill, so while the thought was endearing, it was also risky and dangerous, as he usually ended up worse for wear.

But it wasn’t until Hughie laid unconscious in his arms while Starlight was trying to cauterize his wound that he realised just how deep his love for the man really went. And watching him sleep that night with a relaxed and peaceful expression on his face, that Butcher vowed to do right by Hughie, for once in his life.

He focused all his attention in destroying Vought, going as far as to threaten that old man for him to testify. He couldn’t give Hughie the life he deserved, the soulmate he needed, until his desire for vengeance had been put to rest. Hughie would always be there, now more than ever when Butcher was trying to do right by him.

When Becca came to him asking for help to retrieve her son, it only took one look for her to know that he had found his soulmate. He could never hide anything from her, and she knew him better than anyone. Even when she asked him to come with her, she knew he couldn’t really part from Hughie, the same way she couldn’t part from Ryan when he asked her to run.

But seeing her dying in his arms broke his heart and his spirit. He forgot everything about doing right by anyone, let alone Hughie, as he was ready to kill the kid for everything he had done. But Homelander had interrupted them and he realised that kid was Becca’s and he needed to protect him. Hughie and Becca would never forgive him for hurting Ryan, no matter his mistake. And Butcher was trying to be a better man because of them.

He couldn’t raise the kid, at least not without Becca or Hughie by his side to help him with his uglier side, and he knew Hughie was pulling away from him. He could see it in the way he held onto Starlight, and refused to make eye contact with him. But he would get him back, and he would be whatever Hughie needed from him. 

_ I will be the soulmate Hughie needs, _ he thought as he gave one last look at Mallory and Ryan before walking away. And then, when everything was settled, and Vought was defeated, maybe they could raise Ryan together. 

Yeah, that sounded a good life with his soulmate if you asked him.

…

Hughie had always dreamt of finding his soulmate. The one person in the entire world that would understand him and be what he needed them to be. A best friend, a lover, a partner. Just that one person who would be there for you through and through. It wasn’t until his mother walked out that he understood that soulmates were a bit more complicated than that and that sometimes, your soulmate is not someone who is really right for you.

When he met Robin he had been scared of approaching her, fearing that if he fell for her and realised she was his soulmate, she would eventually leave him behind. She hadn’t been, yet he still lost her and she left, which nearly destroyed him as well. 

Then, he had met Butcher, and had no problem becoming close to the man, clinging onto him after the loss he had suffered. There was no possibility Butcher could be his soulmate, as the man was destructive, rude and impulsive, with little to no regard to Hughie himself. He knew he was only a means to an end to Butcher, and that was fine by him.

At least it was until Translucent exploded and Butcher gave him a place to stay. He was already attached, but gave it no importance, as it was not possible he could ever love someone like Butcher. People like Butcher only loved once in a lifetime, and Butcher had that with his wife. Besides, as far as Hughie was concerned, Butcher already had a soulmate.

So he stayed by his side, following him into danger, listening to him when making up plans. That’s it until he started interacting with Annie, and the same fear he had felt with Robin returned, this time increased ten times. Because if Annie were to be his soulmate, he would have ruined any chance to have her in his life by starting everything with secret agendas and lies.

However, he shouldn’t have worried about that, because the minute Butcher decided to walk away from them and leave Frenchie and MM behind, insulting him in the process, Hughie felt his heart rip in two, as painful as Robin’s death had been. He didn’t need to wonder what it meant when that night he pulled his shirt to see that right above his heart, with poor handwriting and uneven letters, was written ‘Hughie’ for the world to see.

He loved Butcher, and the man had turned out to be his soulmate.

When Butcher came back, he was weary of the man and right down distrustful. He had broken his heart once, who said he wouldn’t do it again? Which Butcher did, when he punched him in the face and ordered him to never “come between him and his missus again or he’ll kill him.” As he laid in the middle of the street, his only thought was that at least the pain in his cheek distracted him from the pain in his heart.

He rekindled his relationship with Annie, if only to ignore the pain of not being Butcher’s choice, while taping over his soulmark so that no one could ever see it. The only person who knew about it was him and that’s how it would stay. Because as far as Hughie knew, Butcher didn’t love him, and would never do. He only loved Becca, and she was back. Hughie was happy for him, not even mad he had ditched them. He would do the same for Butcher without a second thought.

Because while loving Butcher made him feel more alive than he had ever felt since Robin, he also knew that loving him would lead to nothing but pain and destruction. Even though they were soulmates, Hughie knew Butcher would never do anything but hurt him, even when he gave up on his one chance to have Becca back to save him from death or when he was trying to be nice to him and cheer him up. He was Hughie's second wind, the one that could save him or push him down the edge.

It wasn’t until he ended up stabbed in the stomach that he realised that loving Butcher could very well kill him in the process. And while a part of him was thrilled with the knowledge that Butcher did care for him, another, bigger part of him wished for him to live and evolve. So, he started to put on some distance, trying to prove himself and to the world that he was more than Butcher’s shadow. He was his own man, and he could stand on his own.

Which is why, the minute everything cleared, Hughie walked away from The Boys to find his own path. Well, saying the Boys might be a stretch. MM and Frenchie would keep in contact with him and Kimiko would be with Frenchie. He knew he was running away from Butcher, clinging onto Annie even if she wasn’t his soulmate or right for him. At least with her, his heart would be safe. 

He turned to Newman and the new beginning she represented, and left Butcher behind for the time being. He would never be free from Butcher, the man was in his soul, but at least for a while they would be apart. 

The next time they saw each other, Hughie would be a different man, no longer one who clung onto people who didn’t love him. And Butcher could never hurt him again. And that, that was all Hughie would allow himself to dream of Butcher.

The End (?)

**Author's Note:**

> Please give me love and validation.


End file.
